Want to get your bother on starting now?
Read the first chapter from my new book for a jolt of fresh perspective and possibility, and a radical reframe on what to do when you are feeling lost, blah, unmotivated, or burned out, in any area of your life or for any reason — even success!
Last week, I asked you to study how you procrastinate so we can change self-harm into true self-care. If you missed that, go here.
I also promised we would do something with your observations. That’s today.
But first, remember: you procrastinate to take care of yourself, not because you are lazy or unorganized. However, this only you takes care of present-day you, while frustrating, even hurting, future you.
Consider what you observed about yourself with this question in mind:
What feelings did you try and take care of by procrastinating?
Say you were trying to do xyz (paint, write, grow your business, workout, settle in with yourself and just be), you feel a certain emotion (frustrated, bored, resentful, inept, not good enough, anxious, overwhelmed, tired, why bother), and then you ________.
Here’s where things get very interesting: we each have a particular style of procrastination. Sure, we share common elements, but within those elements we each choose the ways that best fit us to escape feeling uncomfortable.
You might, forexample, escape feeling inept and frustrated by calling a friend. You spend an hour coaching and listening to her. You feel better. Only problem now is you have no time for your business planning.
I, on the other hand, read fiction and then take a nap, when I feel inept.
When you get to know your procrastination style, you open up a new path of possibility to choose differently. The approaches you’re currently trying that don’t work? They actually make you procrastinate even more because then you feel even worse!
As you become more familiar with why you procrastinate and try approaches that are a better fit, you naturally develop more self-compassion and stop believing the mean voice(s) in your head that say it’s all a lost cause while showing up more consistently for your desires.
Thanks for your time.
