The Wonder of Thresholds

You have to come to a threshold before in your life, yes?

No doubt more than once.

Some are bold and clear – take the job, move across country.

Some are painful – end the relationship, move out.

Some are dreamlike thresholds that you aren’t certain even exist – tugs of the heart that flicker briefly in the corner of your eye as you awaken but disappear when you turn on the light.

All thresholds start the same – by trusting that what niggles you is important, real, worthy of your attention. And like “normal” thresholds, these misty ones require declarations too except in the misty cases, what you declare is often a tad less concrete.

Let me share my declaration by way of example. A few weeks ago I wrote in my journal,

“Now is the time to turn from the world and it’s approval to the intention – deeply rooted – to serve your true creative expression. Intention is everything. Act on your behalf in everything. This is the intention: connection and service to your artist first.”

Yes I wrote in the 3rd person. Strange times. Strange times.

When you take the new job across the country, tangible things happen. Contracts are signed, movers come, a new job title is conferred. Declare yourself an artist first or declare yourself a servant of the Divine or smithy to the Gods… crickets.

These inner thresholds, let’s face it: they’re weird. Hard to talk about. They feel pretentious. A first world problem like eating crunchy snacks and not being able to hear the TV. Nice if you have the time but shouldn’t you be doing something a tad more useful? (Don’t quote Jung to me in the comments. I get it, I’m just saying.)

And yet, I bet you have crossed these shadowy lintels yourself, and that you will again. Or perhaps, as I have, you have refused the call to cross, wanted to keep things safe, wanted to say at Thanksgiving to Uncle Henry, “Things are great. Just got a promotion, bought a Beamer, it’s all good.”

Sure beats saying, like I will (although not to Uncle Henry, god rest his soul) this holiday season, “I’m taking 7 weeks off to serve my artist first.” Polite smiles. “Oh yes, and I’m eating intuitively.” More polite smiles. Pass the mashed potatoes, please.

That last bit, eat intuitively, feels so important but so weird. What does it have to do with serving my artist first? Hell if I know! Learning to nourish myself with food has eluded me for so long, and I have known I needed to learn what nourishes me and how to give it myself… somehow I know it’s all woven together.

It’s especially hysterical as the antagonist in my novel eats people’s gifts to fuel her power to rule the world.

So for the next 7 weeks, I’m giving myself the gift of tending my artist. With food and walks and writing and very little email and very little time on line. Silence. Listening. Feeling my way. I’ll share a bit about it as I go – stay tuned.

And speaking of gifts, here are the next gifts I want to give to you today. (Gifts one and two are here.)


I made this art. It stands as symbol for my declaration to serve my artist first. I want to give it to one of you, someone who will cherish it as a symbol for your own inner threshold – whatever that might be. Please comment on this post by November 30th, my 50th birthday, and Deb will randomly select one of you. You need to include your email (which is not published) when commenting or we can’t contact you.


Rachel Cole is astonishing gifted in the realm of hungers. I turned to her a few days ago to talk about intuitive eating. I recorded our conversation in hopes it would be of use to you. Rachel also offered to give away one of her Wisdom Notes for a Well-Fed Holiday, a lovely email course on creating a well-fed rather than stuffed holiday season. The course runs for almost the exact same time as my “inward eating artist” time so I also thought that was nice.

Here is some of what we talked about:

  • When we feel a hunger, how do we receive it? Are you tight, judgey, shameful, contracted? Or are we soft, spacious and curious?
  • How can cooking be a sensual, grounding ritual that celebrates the wisdom of our hungers?
  • We must be in joyful choice around food and hunger if we are to be our highest self.
  • If we feel panicky around food and graspy to clean the plate, can we slow down? can we act out of love and do whatever would make us feel the best? can we see that years of rules may have left us with a scarcity mentality, which dissipates the more we practice embracing how much choice we have?!

Download our audio chat here: RachelCole.mp3

To win Rachel’s Wisdom Notes, comment on this post but please comment by this Saturday November 17th at 9 am. The course is available for purchase through November 18th. It would be a super lovely gift for you or someone else.

Okay more gifts for you soon – the next one will not be published here at the blog so be on the list my friends. Now off to walk in the woods. I found a new trail! And then out to dinner to explore more intuitive eating! I love it.

Thanks for being with me.

I’ve helped a million+ people plumb the question: How do you shape & live your truest life?

No pat answers, just imperfection you can use.

I’ve helped a million+ people plumb the question: How do you shape & live your truest life?

No pat answers, just imperfection you can use.