How to Serve


Why seeing yourself as a teacher changes everything for the better

I’m on a gentle mission: to help everyone see themselves as teachers. Here is why I believe you need to see yourself as a teacher: Because when you see yourself as a teacher, you connect with your responsibility to light the way for others, not in a heavy martyred way, but with puckish delight: “Hey […]

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Letting Yourself Belong – How to Heal the Stories of Separation

You hunger to connect. I hunger to connect. And I also clutch my stories that I don’t belong, that I’m too intense to have friends, that nobody likes me. This weekend I attended a writing retreat on the island and one of the women, who I have known lightly for years, said, “Jen, you are so […]

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Freedom from Self-Improvement

I posted on Facebook last week: “Be willing to look at your own life and want more for yourself without beating yourself up or making it about another self-improvement plan.” Molly replied, “I joke that I’m tired of my life being one long self-improvement project. However, I also want to reach my own potential!” That made me sit […]

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How to stop negativity & get more of what you really want

What do you do when you’re afflicted with the “negativity see-me’s?” Or when someone afflicts them on you? In case you aren’t aware, the “negativity see-me’s” are when your brain’s natural negativity bias meets your need to connect, to be seen, to be understood. In case it’s not clear, I made that term up. The way […]

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Savor & Serve October Love Lights

This weekend I’m moving my mom into assisted living. It’s a beautiful new place 3 blocks from me. The people are lovely and my mom is the consummate extrovert so I have high hopes for a surge in her well-being. We’ve decorated her apartment beautifully. I am so grateful for the support… and I am, […]

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Is it time to give privileged guilt the boot?

You are mostly likely privileged. I know I certainly am. I have running water, flush toilets, shoes, enough to eat, and no one is shooting at me. I do work I find fulfilling. I experience love and I am able to love others. I eat organic produce, breathe clean air, sleep safely at night. I […]

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But This Will Make You Happier!

It’s a bit steep. Coming toward me, downhill, is a handsome woman, about my age, her son, 17 or 18, and her husband. She’s using a Gandalf-style wooden walking staff, borrowed from the hotel. Even with just a quick glance, I can see this is one fit, hip mama. Then I hear the son, “Mom, […]

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Finding Your People Right Where You Are

I spent Wednesday night through Monday morning at Patti Digh’s Design Your Life Camp. I taught writing with Patti and Susan Piver, gave a not so great talk on savoring and serving (still finding my way with those ideas), offered a fab dance session, and all along I watched and wondered at the power of […]

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I’ve helped a million+ people plumb the question: How do you shape & live your truest life?

No pat answers, just imperfection you can use.

I’ve helped a million+ people plumb the question: How do you shape & live your truest life?

No pat answers, just imperfection you can use.