How to Serve


Transitions, Teaching, and the Thread of Desire

Hi Loves- I miss writing fresh posts for you and focusing most of my writing energy on the book project feels right – for now. How to be here learning with you and also out there floating and paddling in the vast unknown of the emerging book? That is one of many things I’ll be […]

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Why seeing yourself as a teacher changes everything for the better

I’m on a gentle mission: to help everyone see themselves as teachers. Here is why I believe you need to see yourself as a teacher: Because when you see yourself as a teacher, you connect with your responsibility to light the way for others, not in a heavy martyred way, but with puckish delight: “Hey […]

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Letting Yourself Belong – How to Heal the Stories of Separation

You hunger to connect. I hunger to connect. And I also clutch my stories that I don’t belong, that I’m too intense to have friends, that nobody likes me. This weekend I attended a writing retreat on the island and one of the women, who I have known lightly for years, said, “Jen, you are so […]

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Freedom from Self-Improvement

I posted on Facebook last week: “Be willing to look at your own life and want more for yourself without beating yourself up or making it about another self-improvement plan.” Molly replied, “I joke that I’m tired of my life being one long self-improvement project. However, I also want to reach my own potential!” That made me sit […]

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How to stop negativity & get more of what you really want

What do you do when you’re afflicted with the “negativity see-me’s?” Or when someone afflicts them on you? In case you aren’t aware, the “negativity see-me’s” are when your brain’s natural negativity bias meets your need to connect, to be seen, to be understood. In case it’s not clear, I made that term up. The way […]

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Savor & Serve October Love Lights

This weekend I’m moving my mom into assisted living. It’s a beautiful new place 3 blocks from me. The people are lovely and my mom is the consummate extrovert so I have high hopes for a surge in her well-being. We’ve decorated her apartment beautifully. I am so grateful for the support… and I am, […]

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Is it time to give privileged guilt the boot?

You are mostly likely privileged. I know I certainly am. I have running water, flush toilets, shoes, enough to eat, and no one is shooting at me. I do work I find fulfilling. I experience love and I am able to love others. I eat organic produce, breathe clean air, sleep safely at night. I […]

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But This Will Make You Happier!

It’s a bit steep. Coming toward me, downhill, is a handsome woman, about my age, her son, 17 or 18, and her husband. She’s using a Gandalf-style wooden walking staff, borrowed from the hotel. Even with just a quick glance, I can see this is one fit, hip mama. Then I hear the son, “Mom, […]

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I’ve helped a million+ people plumb the question: How do you shape & live your truest life?

No pat answers, just imperfection you can use.

I’ve helped a million+ people plumb the question: How do you shape & live your truest life?

No pat answers, just imperfection you can use.